I slept 4 hours a night. Woke up early before class to work out- in order to get in Super Amazing Shape.
Worked my lines as often and as much as I could.
When I got tired; I went for a walk or I worked out just to stay awake so I could study more on how to Become HIM.
I felt the constant anxiety of never ever obtaining my goal. Why? Because I started acting at 22 and there was always someone working towards the role I wanted to book.
Why did I want this so bad? To be more then just a name. To be an idea… To be
a superhero, THE PERSON I WANTED TO BE….. was…. wait for it….
A hint: I lost a mother at 11 and regretted every single day thereafter. He also lost his parents at a young age.
The man/ idea I wanted to embody- he’s world-renowned billionaire. Tech genius. Inventor and entrepreneur. Athletic and talented and handsome with a jaw so chiseled that A world renowned sculpture carved the fucker himself.
This guy’s got top of the line sports cars, a few yachts, and when he’s not giving millions of dollars to charities, he’s reeling in supermodel girlfriends like no other.
This guy’s smile can melt the damn room. His charm is so thick you can swim in it.
This man is, you guessed it, Bruce Wayne. Also known as the Batman. And (spoiler alert) he doesn’t actually exist. He is fiction.
I used to devote my entire being to try and become this man. After thousands of hours learning about him; I learned something that I believe a shit ton of people will relate too.
Giving up your dream to just be Average might just make you Super.
Everything in life is a trade-off. Some of us are born with high aptitudes for academic learning. Others are born with great physical skills. Others are athletic. Others are artistic. Others can fuck like rabbits and never break a sweat. Others are created with pronounced jaw lines that make them absolutely suited for Gillette razor commercials. In terms of skills and talents, humans are a wildly diverse group of smelly creatures. Sure, what we end up accomplishing in life ultimately depends on our practice and effort, but we are all born with different aptitudes and potentials.
In Geoff Colvins book “Talent is overrated” he bring up the ideaology of just that: Talent is overrated. As much as I wanna say “visualize yourself dunking over Kobe Bryant” and will yourself to having a height of 6 feet and 7 inches; the truth is the truth. And it friggin stings like a stubbed pinky toe.
But sometimes we’re blessed OR not blessed by genetics. Sometimes this limits us and we have to come to realization that, well, hard work can only get you so far and talent is, well, rated.
Take 6’8″ 250 pounder Lebron James for an example. No matter HOW MUCH he might of wanted too. He is never going to become a horse jockey. It’s just not going to happen for him. As long as there are people out there that are 4’8” 85 lbs the facticity that he’s a certain height and weight limits his ability to transcend and the result of that is: Lebron James is never winning the Kentucky Derby.
This is an example of how one persons ability to transcend in one area can often times by limited by the facts of our genetics and force us to be average.
Another example…I was born with a particular face and a particular ability to put on muscle. No matter HOW MUCH I want to. I am never going to be an Instagram model. The placement of my nose on my face, my uneven eyebrows and all the stuff that’s going on there; well I will never be the kind of person that people voluntarily want to look at and click an emoji that signifies how they’re feeling about the most recent picture of me. It’s just not gonna happen and these facts about me are the parameters I live my life and exercise my freedom within.
We all have our own strengths and weaknesses. But the fact is, most of us are pretty average at most things we do. Even if you’re truly exceptional at one thing — say english, or garage sale hunting, or making money off the black gun market — chances are you’re pretty average or below average at most other things. That’s just the nature of life. To become truly great at something, you have to dedicate time and energy to it. And because we all have limited time and energy, few of us ever become truly exceptional at more than one thing, if anything at all.
We can then say that it is a complete statistical improbability that any single person can be an extraordinary performer in all areas of their life, or even many areas of their life. Bruce Wayne does not exist. It just doesn’t happen. Brilliant businessmen are often fuck ups in their personal lives. Extraordinary athletes (not all of them) are often shallow and as dumb as a lobotomized rock.
We’re all, for the most part, pretty average people. It’s the extremes that get all of the publicity. We all kind of intuitively know this, but we rarely think and/or talk about it. The vast majority of us will never be truly exceptional at, well, anything. And that’s OK.
So here’s the problem. I would argue that we have this expectation (or this entitlement) more today than any other time in history. And the reason is because of the nature of our technology and economic privilege.
Having the internet: and having Mr. Google, President Facebook, Queen Twitter, Mrs. Instagram, King YouTube and access to 500+ channels of television is amazing. We have access to more information than any other time in history.
But here’s the other problem:
Our attention is limited. Say it ain’t so. There’s no way we can process the tsunami waves of information flowing through the internet at any given time. Maybe Bruce Wayne can do it. I know I can’t. I mean, the guy doesn’t sleep… anyways, the only ones that break through and catch our attention are the truly exceptional pieces of information. The 99.999th percentile.
All day, every day, we are flooded with the truly extraordinary. The best of the best. The worst of the worst. The greatest physical feats. The funniest jokes. The most upsetting news. The scariest threats. Non-stop.
Our lives today are filled with information coming from the top of the top. Why? Because that’s what gets viewers and the viewers bring dollars. That’s it. Yet the vast majority of life continues to reside in the middle.
After analyzing my relationship that this flood of extreme information has conditioned me to believe that; it’s that “exceptional” is the new normal. And since all of us are rarely exceptional, we all feel pretty shitty, down/ depressed and desperate to feel “exceptional” all the time. So we must compensate. Some of us do this by buying into get-rich-quick schemes. Others do it by scanning through Instagram photos and making a habit of quitting new hobbies every thirty seconds because they’re not doing what they’re “meant” to be doing. Others do it by excelling in school and winning every award. Others do it by shooting up a school. Others do it by trying to have sex with anything that walks and talks.
Where does all these deceptions come from. Sometimes it’s your heroes and the people you look up to. Somehow it’s accepted that that we are all destined to do something truly extraordinary. Celebrities say it. Businesses say it. Politicians say it. Arnold Schwarzenegger says it. Tom Cruise says it. Each and every one of us can be extraordinary. We all deserve greatness.
I believe in mind over matter. But don’t work against yourself and believe in bullshit.
“If it smells like shit, well then it’s probably shit.”- LTN
After all, if everyone was extraordinary, then by definition, no one would be extraordinary and this is missed by most people, and instead we eat the message up and ask for more.
Being “average” has become the new criterion to failure. The worst thing you can be is in the middle of the pack, the middle of the crowd. I’m here to tell you. That it’s okay to be “okay.”
A lot of people are afraid to accept mediocrity because they believe that if they accept being mediocre, then they’ll never achieve anything, never improve, and that their life doesn’t matter.
I find this sort of thinking to be dangerous. Once you accept the premise that a life is only worthwhile if it is truly notable and great, then you basically accept the fact that most of the human population sucks and is worthless. And ethically speaking, that is a really dark place to put yourself.
All of this “every person can be extraordinary and achieve greatness” stuff is basically just jerking off your ego. It’s shit sold to you to make you feel good for a few minutes and to get you through the week without hanging yourself in your cubicle. It’s a message that tastes good going down, but in reality, is nothing more than empty calories that make you emotionally fat and bloated, the proverbial Big Mac for your heart and your brain.
The ticket to emotional health, like physical health, comes from eating your veggies — that is, through accepting the bland and mundane truths of life: a light salad of “you’re actually pretty average in the grand scheme of things” and some steamed broccoli of “the vast majority of your life will be mediocre.” This will taste bad at first. Very bad. You will avoid eating it.
But once ingested, your body will wake up feeling more potent and more alive. After all, that constant pressure to always be something amazing, to be the next big Batman, to be the next worlds “greatest,” will be lifted off your back. The stress and anxiety of feeling inadequate will discontinue. And the knowledge and acceptance of your own mundane existence will actually free you to accomplish what you truly wish to accomplish with no judgments and no lofty expectations.
You will have a growing appreciation for life’s basic experiences. You will learn to be a realistic dreamer through a new, healthier means: the pleasures of simple friendship, creating something, helping a person in need, reading a good book, laughing with someone you care about.
Sounds boring, doesn’t it? That’s because these things are average. But maybe they’re average for a reason. Because they are what actually matters. Maybe if there was a “real- life Batman” he do very mundane tasks but stay consistent. He may exist. And he’s not the one who’s fake in the stories. It’s the one who helps a person in need by reading a good book and spreads their knowledge, or laughs with someone they care about.
Comment below and let me know how being an “Average- Hero” is creating a real life super hero.